There are many forms of mediation available to individuals who are experiencing marital difficulties. Consequently, the role of the mediator varies accordingly. Whether parties employ a family law mediator or a family therapist, one essential attribute of an effective mediation is that the mediator remain impartial. Parties sometime require the assistance of mediators to help them resolve the emotional and spiritual conflict of divorce, while others are searching for ways to cope with property settlements, child custody arrangements and resolution of life’s everyday conflicts. Regardless of the reason one seeks mediation, there are appropriate mediators available. Our office strives to provide services in a compassionate and common sense manner. Our goal in providing mediation services is to not only facilitate the division of assets and timesharing with children, but also to assist the parties in the redefinition of their relationship. Successful mediation, however, ultimately depends on the parties taking full advantage of the mediation process to express their concerns in an effort to resolve their differences.

      Individuals who choose to participate in mediation through my office must be dedicated to the process and must demonstrate their commitment by communicating openly and honestly. One of our primary goals is to provide the parties with a safe environment in which they can fully express themselves. Mediation requires full disclosure and facilitates only fully informed consent. Regarding the role of outside attorneys, the parties are not required to obtain counsel, but are strongly advised to do so to assist them in the decision-making process. When necessary, the parties are also encouraged to employ joint experts to provide realistic reports and data, as opposed to litigating experts who typically present more skewed figures in favor of their clients. I believe that clients who are fully informed when making decisions will ultimately be more satisfied with the outcome of the agreements reached in mediation.

      I wholeheartedly support the mediation process because it affords clients a level of flexibility which litigation cannot. During mediation parties can make agreements tailored to their family’s needs which a court would otherwise not have the jurisdiction (power) to order. As long as each party fully understands his or her rights, they are not required to adhere to the many policies and formulas of family law. After all, there is no Court in a better position to make decisions about individual families than the family members themselves.

      Another reason that I believe mediation is a better alternative to litigation is the cost savings. Full-blown litigation is a luxury few individuals can afford today. Even when parties have the financial wherewithal to fund litigation, it can often have a devastating financial impact on the parties, drastically reducing their standard of living after the termination of their marriage. It has been my experience that mediating clients save a significant amount of money that would otherwise be paid to attorneys and an array of expert witnesses.

      The mediation process also fosters client confidentiality by avoiding the airing of clients’ “dirty laundry” in public courts. Court records are public records and declarations filed by the parties and their experts are oftentimes open to scrutiny by the media. Courts are reluctant to seal files, but cooperative clients can agree to engineer judgments which would not be made part of the Court’s file unless contested at some point in the future.

      Mediation provides a financially sound and emotionally sagacious alternative to litigation. As opposed to the “one size fits all” approach of the judicial system, where judgements are not particularly suited to each individual case, mediation offers a custom fit specifically tailored to all parties involved. It not only leads to a better solution of current disputes but also lays the foundation for a more amicable relationship in the future.